A different look at positive thinking

Positive thinking is not the denial of difficult situations, but an acceptance of what has happened and then looking for positive ways to react.

It’s my hope in this post to show how being a positive person is a key component to thinking positively when problems arise.

Balance

In order for optimistic thinking to be beneficial, it must be balanced with reality and subsequently determined what positive steps must be taken. Positive thinking without initiative is worthless. Fantasy is an excellent dopamine for imagining many things, such as what we would do if we won the lottery.

However, it can prevent people from taking action if they become jealous of the things they see around them. It can also lead to bitterness and cynicism if someone compares their life or circumstance to others and becomes angry that they are not living the way they would like. If a fantasy is the catalyst for a person to take action to improve their life, that’s wonderful, but frequently, fantasy results in bitterness and cynicism.

The path to practical positive thinking: 

Acceptance of consequences

Whatever we do, we must accept the consequences of our actions. The tougher thing to accept is that life is not fair and often on the surface, some people seem to escape consequences. We quickly learn that there are cheats, poor refereeing decisions, unfortunate situations etc., but if you are to be any good, then you still do your best, accepting that sometimes things are unfair and the consequences painful, but the way forward is to respond with grace and persistence to come back stronger, better equipped and smarter. This is positive thinking in action. 

Ask this question strongly:

How come we carry ‘THE BAGGAGE’ of a negative result or experience for years, yet only carry “THE GLOW” of a win or positive experience for short periods of time?

This is a twisting of reality, but extremely common, and if you think about it, totally illogical. Remember to keep a balance between the successes and the losses. The consequences of hanging onto the negatives only or for long periods will severely hamper your life! The consequences of not being able to ring-fence a negative event and balance it out with the positive events that have happened can be devastating. It is possible to use a negative incident to create something positive in the aftermath, with many inspiring examples, such as Oprah Winfrey. Whether you see the glass as half full or half empty, the reality it is half-and-half. At worst, remember the half full rather than focusing fully on what is missing.

• Life is not always fair, and neither are the consequences 

• How we react and think about events is in our control, and we need to remember to balance our view.

Walk the talk

Attempting to walk the talk is one way to help your state of mind stay positive. 

When you can trust what you say is what you will deliver and others have the same trust in you, then there is a peace of mind as you go about your endeavours eliminating the stress that comes from lying or evading people because you’re not delivering on your word. We are all hypocritical; probably more often than we care to admit. When we reflect on one of our smart suggestions to others, how often do the words have an element of do as I say, not what I do about it? 

Working hard to walk the talk and become less of a hypocrite, which is critical to long-term credibility and positivity.

Have an aim to do what you say you will do, enjoy your work, always learn, and feel excited about the process. This state of mind is positive and healthy.

No one is without weaknesses, insecurities, and frailty, and no one is always in complete control of their life. My book Locker Room Power is founded on the belief that we know our competitors are vulnerable and if you are brave and committed to delivering your plan, it gives you the best chance of succeeding.

The world is a competitive arena, and although we may wish to ignore it, we must be ready to handle its stresses. It is healthy to be competitive and to compete for excellence, rather than to fear it. The tension we feel is usually a mixture of our insecurities and often because of our failure to prepare properly. Our individual locker room power is a part of preparation. If we are well organised and have a history of doing what we say, we will have less to fear in any situation. This is where intimidation comes in. It is a part of preparation to recognise that others are likely to intimidate us, and the best and most positive response is to stick to our prepared plan and focus on our strengths.

• Work hard to walk the talk, which is critical to long-term credibility. 

• Being firm and aggressive can be crucial to winning.

• Believe in your processes and deliver with a confident and relaxed attitude.

Be Happy

We should celebrate and find great satisfaction in winning and in any small everyday accomplishment. It is brilliant when successful people are comfortable in their skin, enjoying and appreciating what they have. It is even more admirable when they are grateful for their opportunity, appreciative of the help given to them along the way, and share in their good fortune. Relish the journey because when you “get” there, the journey just continues whether or not you like it, and only ends when you die. The quote below is the truth about positive thinking. We can choose how we think!

Life and tennis have ups and downs, and happiness is not a goal. Happiness is what we believe it to be and therefore we may as well try to design a happy environment. We need to create an environment where the people we spend time with working, training, socializing all encourage and support each other because it is so much easier to stay positive with enthusiastic and positive people around us. Achieving is hard and we have to suffer sometimes to get what we want and rarely will anyone criticise us as much as we do ourselves, so don’t pile on the pressure by surrounding yourself with negative people.

Feet on the Ground

Being grounded is a great positive and healthy. This is a challenge to every successful person, staying grounded! Consider that being a great footballer or tennis player is useless when your house is flooding, you need a great plumber. 

Talent and expertise are relative to the task at hand.

There are geniuses who are uniquely gifted individuals with amazing ability that take your breath away. However, many great achievements are made by ordinary people who work hard to perform something exceptionally, so it is important to see success as being able to accomplish extraordinary feats through hard work and good teamwork as an ordinary person. The real stars understand they are doing something wonderfully well and are thankful and devoted to the art of doing their job, not the accolades. 

In conclusion

The path to positive thinking is:

• Acceptance of consequences
• Ask why is negativity kept for such a long time when positivity is so short-lived
• Walk the talk
• Be happy
• Keep your feet on the ground

Written by

David Sammel